Tuesday, August 14, 2012
TMI Throwback: Sex and Romance
This TMI throwback comes from February 28th of this year. The topic that day for TMI Tuesday was Sex and Romance. The WordPress gang asked: "Who doesn't enjoy a little romance or the art of seduction before engaging in sex? Often times the prelude is better than the actual event."
I agree wholeheartedly. So here are the answers to the questions I chose:
What's more important, a romantic relationship or your career?
this is difficult to answer, many years ago it would have been a no-brainer, and now I'm not so sure. All through my high school and college years, I was focused on getting my shit together. Get the education, get the career, make your mark. THEN look for love. Well, I'm in my 30s and have neither career nor partner. Careers can be satisfying and sustain you, but they're hardly enough. In the last year I've been working on getting my professional life moving in the direction I want for many reasons, but among them I may never partner or have children. Thus having something that gives me satisfaction and something to do with my time becomes very important.
I want a partner. I want children of my own and have seriously considered fostering and adoption once I have more financial stability. I have a manageable, genetic health condition which sometimes knocks me on my ass. It has several times in the last year to different degrees of severity. So I know going it alone as a single parent is not exactly wise. Nor do I have a support system in place to help me.
But as to which is more important? Neither. Fremily is most important. A rather interesting woman I know introduced me to the term "fremily". I don't know if she coined it, but it's my new favorite word. Fremily is friends and family. The genetic people who truly are your family, and the non-genetic family (very good friends) who are close enough to be considered family. Those who are your nearest and dearest. Where you are always welcome, and remembered during good times and bad.
I'm blessed to have some truly wonderful people in my life, almost ALL of them are a minimum 3 hour drive away. Gets rather frustrating when I want to hang out or if I'm having a particularly bad day/week/etc. Gas is expensive and the modern world keeps everyone ridiculously busy. So if I can't have a partner, I want a fremily. Jobs come and go. Careers can be built, rebuilt, or shifted laterally. Fremily, once built, is forever. I can be sister and aunt PP and be very fulfilled that way. These days, I'm focused on being the member of a fremily or three.
So neither. Whyever would I want to be the same as everyone else? ;)
You love to role play in the bedroom, which one of these is more likely to be your kink?
a. doctor and the naughty nurse
b. you're the gardener, I'm the hoe
c. persnickety principal and the wayward pupil that needs a spanking
d. me Tarzan, you Jane
e. scatter-brained boss and the seductive secretary
hmmmm. I'm rather new to roll-play, and mostly via sexting or sexy IM. I rather enjoy it. I have to say option C-- principal and student. I've recently been able to experiment with spanking, and I REALLY like it.
REALLY like it.
A friend helped me experiment, and I think he really enjoyed it as well. When we've sexted, we usually do it along the lines of teacher/student. That works well for me. I also like the idea of Me Tarzan, you Jane. Never played that particular game, but there's something about the idea of controlled dominance that appeals to me. The carefully controlled fantasy of being taken against a wall, over a couch, etc. That turns me on.
When you want sex, who tends to make the first move?
a. Me! I like to go for what I want.
b. It varies. Sometimes my partner/significant other/date or sometimes me.
c. Oh definitely the other person. Even if I want it, I'm not about to admit such a thing.
d. I drop subtle hints hoping s/he will pick up on it.
Weeeeellllll, I'll drop hints but I don't know how subtle they always are. So D is part true. As to C, it's not that I'm opposed to admitting I want sex, but I don't have a good track record when it comes to rejection. So I'm not very confident initiating. A is difficult for me where the bedroom is concerned. B is always the ideal, of course. I would be much happier/more comfortable if I had a partner who initiated often. Then I'd be more confident as the initiator.
When it comes to lovemaking, select the answer that best describes you/your attitudes:
a. vanilla -- meets society's middle of the road standards
d. trisexual -- I will try anything once, twice if I like it, three times to make sure. --Mae West
A, B, or C depending on my mood. Quietly vanilla in missionary position can be very intense emotionally, and delightfully intimate. Adventurous and kinky can also be fun. I have a lot of things on my sex bucket list to cross off under those two categories.
But you can FORGET about D. Some things are just NOT sanitary. Some things aren't to my taste. And some things.... I love Mae, though. "When I'm bad, I'm very bad, but when I'm good I'm even better" :D
You want to seduce that sexy someone, what is the sweet-nothing that you'll whisper in his/her ear?
When thinking about my most recent flirtation, actual whispering didn't work. Most of our interaction was WAY too public. Certain types of pictures were very effective. >:) Going commando, and telling him, got nice reactions. As did asking for a spanking. We had a LOT of intellectual foreplay via text. I've gotten some great masturbation sessions out of them. Sadly, I moved out of state and we don't get to play live any more. Such is life.
BONUS: What's your idea of a romantic getaway?
This is actually VERY easy. Someplace private in the woods near a body of water. Hills or mountains a bonus. Nature, beauty, quiet. The ability to walk around in my birthday suit wherever I want. A fireplace, a screened porch, places to walk and hike and watch and enjoy. During cold weather the enforced solitude would be nice. So would enduring lots of storms. Wonderful to watch and listen to. As long as there is plenty of food, indoor plumbing, and A/C in case of extreme heat ...... sign me up!